mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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