First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I smell like Dick and happiness
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
