nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Randomize
