I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
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