Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
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