But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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