you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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