Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
