I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
