i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
