Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Barsexuality is the new black.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
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