awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
