About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
