by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
