I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
