is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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