I think i peed on brittanys purse
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
