He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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