goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
