your parents love me but you hate me
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Randomize
