god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
