We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize