Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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