So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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