i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
he wants to bone in the snuggie
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
