i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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