fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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