Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize
