she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
