I am midnight drunk by noon
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
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