Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
