Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
