Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
