I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
