I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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