I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize