sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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