I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
