i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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