There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Quick, to the slutcave!
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
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