covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize