I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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