guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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