Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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