I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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