well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Omg I joined a choir last night...
that is very illegal...i love you.
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