you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize