I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize