Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
