I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
