Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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